Two years ago today, as I rode the train home from work, I received a phone call that changed my life. I learned my Mom had lost her battle with brain cancer. Whereas it was not a surprise, she was very ill, you can never prepare for the words I heard on the other end of the line. “Mark, your Mom passed away.”
The call didn’t come from my sister, brother or Dad, it came from my wife Susan. I don’t want to call it pay back, because it is anything but this when it comes to losing a loved one; but when her brother passed away 4 days after we were married, I was in the very same spot. I gave her the same news. It is not only difficult---it truly sucks.
In many ways it seems like yesterday my Mom passed away; in other ways it seems like much longer. I am not sure how you are supposed to feel when you lose someone so important to you, but it took a long time for me to believe she was actually no longer living in the home I grew up in. I have been to her grave, and trust me she is no longer physically alive; however, she has never left our hearts, thoughts and never will.
What I would like to say to my Mom two years later is, “Mom, we are all doing okay.” We think about you every day---and no matter how much it bothers me to admit to Southwest Airlines that my middle name is “Elliot” (you blessed me with that wonderful name) I think of you every time I see it on the ticket when I show it to board the plane. (It’s now information you have to give to the airline and they slap it right on the ticket for everyone to see--thanks.)
Also, Mom, you will not believe it, Dad can cook! Seriously. I know, it’s a shocker but he makes a mean chili, great barbecued chicken and really good cold cut sandwiches. Who would ever have believed it could happen? He does need to put on some weight--- he told me the other day he has gained 10 pounds---I told him to put on 10 more. (Thought you would get a chuckle out of that.)
Gary, JoAnn and I are doing well too; we feel the vacancy when we are all together at home, but we also know you are there with us. A few updates for you. Gary’s aquarium is bigger than it was the last time you saw it (apparently it leaked several months ago when he was gone and Dawn was not a happy camper), JoAnn is spending a lot of time with Dad,Brooke is getting married, Jason has a serious girlfriend, Amanda lives in Dallas and works at Dillards, Cheney is in college at DePauw, Izzy is a freshman in high school, Audrey is the spittin’ image of Susan, Cheney and Izzy—and Sophie got her ears pierced and her hair cut for the first time in her 7 years of life. Oh yeah, Susan and I "learned our lesson" about the photography business. (Mom, we got another dog---I was talked in to it---I should have fought harder against it because he is a pain in the butt.)
Mom, we miss you. We miss you like you cannot believe; but as I wrote 2 years ago on this very day, knowing what that damn disease was doing to you, you are in a better place not having to live with it any longer. These are the toughest words I could write---and even though I miss you---I didn’t want you to suffer one minute longer.
The photo above was taken recently at a family event. I am sorry to say everyone was not there, but I could always photo shop in any missing family members if needed. This is a very important photo at a very important event; the last time we gathered, we learned my Mom was sick; prior to that (same event---different date), we learned my Aunt was ill, and on the very day of this celebration, we remembered the loss of my Uncle Joe who had passed away a year earlier. We miss them all and were all very relieved this one went off without a hitch.
Thanks for stopping by.
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